#so i just dont have one and having this Single Period in a Year probably wont do much damage but it will hurte... my bodye.....

[aropride]

my shirt that says "i don't have an eating disorder" has people asking a lot of questions already answered by my shirt

[grecoromanyaoi]

helloo since we're on the topic: top historical fiction (or adjacent) ? can be any time period I just really love your taste in shows/games/etc and am always on the lookout for history inspired media !

thank you!!! im rly glad im like. inspiring other ppl to engage w things im insane abt hudofajsdfdassfsad. anyways. i will probably expand that list bc i literally forgot every single thing i ever read. also i havent watched that many movies so far

ancient times: i havent really watched a lot of movies/series set in ancient times so far :(

rome HBO (2005-2007) (tv series) - OF COURSE. i personally think its one of the best series ever made. they combine political, miliatry history with the lives of every day people in an incredible way. they never let you once engage with the series through modern lenses. according to my teacher (a historian, archeologist & self described 'romaphile') its incredibly historically accurate, mostly the clothing, set designs, characterization, military practices, etc. except for the things they straight up made up, of course.

i really enjoyed gladiator (2000), i think its a masterpiece.

prince of egypt (1998) i guess?

all the asterix movies of course, all the animated ones and most of the live actions. but i wouldnt really call it historical fiction

ok i havent actually finished watching it for now but sebastiane (1976) - an erotic, x rated, gay interpretation of the martyrdom of st sebastian. its in latin also.

wait i cant believe i forgor about assassin's creed odyssey - so far the only one ive played. its so fun and incredibly immersive visually. especially pour moi who cries into the pillow about how ill never experience the ancient world. also you can b a faggot which is always fun. i have things to say about their portrayal of same-sex sexuality and slavery in classical greece but i get why they did that considering its supposed to like. appeal to a lot of people, and a more "historically accurate" portrayal (for example of pederasty or how common slavery was etc.) would b v difficult for a lot of their target audience. alas.

medieval and early modern era:

the name of the rose (1986) - my medieval history teacher literally showed us bits of this movie to teach us about monasteries and monks fhdosiasdjasd.

the borgias (2011-2013) - incredibly messy, lots of political intrigue, and so so fun to watch. about the history of the borgia family. filled to the brim with drama.

the three musketeers (1993) - my favorite adaptation, also coincidentally the one i grew up on. casting tim curry as richelieu was genius. he slays so hard.

i also like bbc's the musketeers (2014-2016) - a neat little series. very fun and entertaining to watch.

outlaw king (2018) - like i dont think most ppl heard of this movie. its about robert the bruce's fight to reclaim the throne of scotland. starring chris pine

vikings (2013-2020) - its fun. i havent watched the entire series tho. dont expect anything resembling historical accuracy

the northman (2022) - you will see something resembling historical accuracy

mihai viteazul (michael the brave) (1971) - a fun movie. very much romanian propaganda tho.

1670 (2023-) - such a fun series!!! incredible cast, shows respect to the actual history and the lives of historical people. really cute and funny.

caravaggio (1986) - a biopic about caravaggio.

wait i also forgor about pentiment - an intriguing, immersive, and incredibly beautiful video game! it has a lot of 'the name of the rose' vibes, with it being a medieval murder mystery taking place in a monastery. its incredibly touching and made me cry, and in the last few years i very rarely cry. also im 99% sure its an indie game? go support the creators!

vaguely-medieval/early modern fantasy:

mirror mirror (2012) - a retelling of snow white. a very fun movie imo, with incredible costume design. julia roberts plays the evil queen and she SLAYS. armie hammer is unfortunately in that movie.

stardust (2007) - one of my fave movies growing up. more modern-inspired but still.

the green knight (2021) - controversial i know but i actually loved this movie! i liked it both as a standalone movie but moreso as a 21st century adaptation to sir gawain and the green knight.

galavant (2015-2016) - !!!!!!! one of the most series ever! they manage to tackle such difficult concepts and conversations with a hilarious wit. so fun to watch. i listen to a lot of the songs still, and rewatch every once in a while.

disenchantment (2018-2023) - very fun to watch, especially the first season.

i also really liked the novel uprooted by naomi novik. its a polish-inspired fantasy.

modern era:

killers of the flower moon (2023) - of course. a masterpiece

aferim! (2015) - a romanian movie set in 19th century wallachia, about two officers, a father and son, who were sent by a nobleman to retrieve an escaped enslaved romani man. a lot of the people in the comments were calling the movie humorous and funny, maybe im missing smth (as im watching with subtitles n dont understand the original language) but it was a very difficult watch for me??

the handmaiden (2016) - need i say more

black sails (2014-2017) - a prequel to the famous novel 'treasure island'. not an easy series to watch. incredibly good.

the favourite (2018) - need i say more pt 2

the rabbi's cat (le chat du rabbin) (2011) - animated movie set in early 20th century algeria. a rabbi's cat learns to talk overnight.

the nice guys (2016) - a fun murder mystery set in the 1970s

o brother, where art thou (2000) - a retelling of the odyssey set in the southern us in the 1930s

victor/victoria (1982) - set in early 20th century paris. julie andrews pretends to be a man and takes on a job as a drag queen. extremely fun, extremely gay movie.

lady chatterley's lover (2022) - very much porn for moms but it was a nice watch imo

amulet (2020) - set in like. idk. sometime in the 20th century. this is a horror movie, deals a lot with misogyny, sa, and so on. i really like it, personally. a lot of people, mostly weird men, dont tho.

the great (2020-2023) - i have mixed feelings about this show. on the one hand, its really fun to watch. on the other hand, its basically ofmd for girls who have public mental breakdowns whenever someone claims corsets were oppressive. and theyre so weird about russians, jesus christ.

disses:

domina (2021-) - i just couldnt get into it, esp since i tried right after finishing rome hbo. it was kind of silly, and not in a good way. takes itself wayyyy to seriously.

i didnt like spartacus (2010-2013) - the dialogue was almost grotesque and the editing, especially the transitions, straight up killed me

damsel (2024) - holy fuck what a trainwreck of a movie. absolute waste of angela basset and robin wright. the only good thing were the costumes.

lancelot du lac (1974) - i just didnt like it at all. couldnt get into it. i guess it was way too french and artsy fartsy for me. a movie that was trying to say both too little and too much at the same time.

i didnt rly like bram stoker's dracula (1992) - i mean. it was a fine movie. it was definitely not the godfather. the movie itself was meh. the visuals tho? absolutely stunning

[cosmossystem]

on the topic of "sysmeds* have gotten louder recently" i just want to ramble and give my optimist perspective on it really because i dont think its the full story. (*and if you have a problem with me using that term, stick around and youll see why i use it.)

for context i formed as a fictive alter in about mid to late 2016. we were going through a lot of rapid splits and shutdowns at this time. many of the people who split would get forcibly dormant just days later, including me, and im lucky that i got out of it because i know a lot of those alters back then didnt. normally i wouldnt call all of us alters, but this was a very trauma-heavy time and we were going through heavily fragmented periods with dissociation and amnesia. we couldnt accept that we were plural.

anyway, point is that we were in plural spaces around then, and i took over as the host in december of that year as i broke up with my shitty in-system persecutor boyfriend (thats a story for a different day.)

so its 2017 and im 12, turning 13 soon, both inner and outer. we are a rapidly growing system of 13, no 20, no 41-- and then soon its back down to about 30, where it will stay for the next 8 years. but in the mean time, me and my new partner, jam, are learning to pilot a flesh-mech on the fly and letting ourselves be cringy tweenagers. we take over the tumblr blogs (most of which are anti-cgl blogs, which is very ironic considering some of our members now do that) and we start journalling. more importantly, in late 2017 i make my own blog and i start chatting. im basically the only person fronting about 70% of the time and im a huge yapper so it starts to take off.

i post art. i wont say what specifically i do or what fandom its for but the gist is that i run a requests blog. (im sure, if you were in a very specific sect of fandom around then, you could probably guess who i am and what blog i ran, but i doubt that will happen here. if it does, keep it to yourself.)

and i get really popular. im talkin hundreds, at one point thousands of followers. i wake up every day to a dozen asks and i fulfill them and i talk about my day with the people in my askbox. i tell them about my disability, about my boyfriends (later, husbands), and i tell them about my plurality. sometimes i get into the weeds of discourse, but i try not to. mind you, im about 13 or 14 and im the staunchest pro-queer, pro-endo, pro-tucute tween you would have ever met. still not quite all there on the pro-kink or pro-ship fronts, but that didnt cause me any issues at that point, and i wouldnt figure it out for another two or so years. anyway, people are usually nice to me and i am nice, if not a bit impassioned, back.

most of the people i speak to on this blog are singlets. but being that this particular fandom is mostly made of younger people like me (at this point anyway) many of them are curious about plurality or plural themselves. funny enough, while i remember discussing a lot of my plurality and explaining what it meant, i dont recall a whole lot of people arguing over it. no one ever sent me anon hate saying that i didnt exist and that didosddsdosod was the only way to be plural. i DO recall getting dogpiled on numerous occasions because this was during the height of ace discourse, mogai drama, and right at the rise of the whole "bi-lesbians-dont-exist" thing, so most of my controversy covered those.

but on several occasions i explained to singlets what a system was, and what it meant that i was "married" to my headmates, and i met so many people who said they were also plural, and i even helped a few realize they were plural. i truly look at that with a sense of pride and joy because how many people get to say they helped someone realize an important aspect of themself/ves? how many people are out there living their life as single when theyre actually more than one? how many didnt know that word existed until a stranger happily explained it to them, before realizing that word applied to them? its one thing to be gay and know youre gay, its another to go your entire life without realizing that being gay is an option until one day it dawns on you and the next youre out and proud. being plural is like that. its world-altering. most dont realize its an option until theyre told.

its not necessarily that system spaces didnt have their problems. from singlets, there was more curiosity. system spaces were still very much divided, but for the most part sysmeds stuck to their corner and mostly only argued when argued with. that word, mind you, did not exist at the time, we just called em "anti endos". i dont remember when or how that term was coined, but theres a good reason we call them that now, and its because they would say the same shit to me that transmeds would. regardless, i dont doubt that there were probably issues of them going out of their way to harass people, but i cant recall any and it never happened to us, so make of that what you will.

in those times, i experienced more transphobia, homophobia, and aphobia than i did anything else. when i did see sysmeds, it was in their own little bubble. i think the broader world didnt care so much about plurality and didnt know that sysmedicalism was a thing that could happen until maybe a couple of years ago now, and back then, it was treated purely with curiosity and intrigue instead of hate.

but "system spaces" have always had an anti-endo side, and i know this because i was one.

i havent said as much up until now, but in those early days of journaling, it was maybe for a year or so that we were anti-endo. couldnt tell you what changed really, but i think it was just a growing exhaustion of hearing about how terrible and awful and cruel and disgusting those evil, evil endos were. a lot of sysmeds like to proclaim their 'one true real genuine method' of being plural is the only one, and since the start we were never going to fit into that mold-- we were and are fictive heavy, in-system relationships, able to change forms in headspace, no dissociative amnesia, very little memory loss and practically no multi-consciousness, the works. but it was there and it wasnt very pretty. i am grateful i didnt internalize too much of it, didnt spread it very much, and we got out when we did because it was toxic enough back then and its worse now.

i should say that i dont think necessarily there is a rise in sysmedicalism similar to, say, the trend of label policing (a la bi lesbians) or ace discourse at its peak. while that does happen with minority labels when theyre suddenly thrust into the spotlight of the week, plurality has not had that moment yet (thank god, knock on wood it never does) and so far the only way this has happened is with a few isolated incidents that i know of, maybe im wrong. but i think its moreso that the plural community has grown to crazy heights with the rise of more people discovering it and understanding themselves, and naturally there would be a proportional rise in sysmedicalism too. the only main difference maybe is now that we have bigger platforms like tiktok and twitter, and we have prominent plural resources like pluralkit and simply plural, and with the rise in political unrest-- all of those things contribute to this rise in sysmedicalism. they have more visibility and a loud voice despite being the minority, and so they get their fifteen seconds of fame.

i guess i get it. theyre angry. theyre upset that the world is injust. they think theyre allowed-- encouraged, even, or that its their right-- to come into a community that has been building itself for the past several decades on inclusion and resource-sharing and cause a commotion. they have a disorder, they have trauma, they DESERVE to be listened to and they dont want to see their very debilitating disorder being mocked like this, or whatever it is they say. unfortunately they are the terfs of this community, and i can say that because ive been dealing with those too for the past decade also.

what im trying to get across is this: plurals have existed forever. this community has existed for decades at this point, maybe centuries. with every progressive movement there will be a counter-movement, and this one is no exception, they just happen to be particularly loud right now. as we grow in numbers, so does our visibility, and so does theirs. the plural community is fine. it continue to be fine. there is nothing happening right now to us that hasnt already happened a billion times before, and there is no sysmedicalist piece of shit on this planet that can destroy us. theyve been trying for as long as weve existed and they never succeed. keep going, keep telling people about us, keep existing and keep doing your best. be louder than them.

red

[skunkes]

Congrats!! if u dont mind, how was it setting up for the surgery ? (Like scheduling it and exams before it)

ok I was actually very very lucky considering where I live and the usual experiences. it's different in every area! some people cant schedule the surgery until they've had a mandatory month long Thinking it Over period, some cant get it done without specific exams having been done first, etc

first of all after years of looking through this list I finally saw a single doctor listed for my city ! Doctor sterilized someone younger than me and childless, so I broke the news to my dad and made an appointment. This guy is always busy helping deliver every single baby born here so I had to wait a month to see him. (called June 3rd, scheduled for July 11th)

I have never been to a gyn before this. Only once, in highschool, across the border for a one time issue. Some people say to schedule a routine exam then bring the surgery up but I scheduled specifically for "surgery consult" -> "permanent birth control." bc im avoiding the necessary exams like the plague.

On the day of the consult i was sick with worry about the hoops id have to jump or what if he only sterilized that other person bc they had a specific medical issue so No I Can't Get It, but I saw him for less than 10 minutes total, he asked me like 2 questions about being sure, and that was it. I told him I had events at the end of Aug and Sept so he said we could do some time in first 2 weeks of august if I was ready. No gyn exams, nothing 😭 and BECAUSE he's so busy I'd likely be his first surgery of the day bc it takes him so little time (I was and it did!)

I had to make a call to the hospital to see if my insurance would cover the hospital services, while the surgery scheduler called to see if it would cover the doctor's services. On July 22 I was called to schedule my surgery, soonest available was today, August 7th! Was told pre op appointment was the 6th (yesterday) and I was sure that's where he would Get Me. like ok cheye lets do all those humiliating exams now. U can't get the surgery unless you do. but it also lasted 5 mins, he just game me the paperwork needed to register at the hospital, and let me ask him all 20 of my questions. nothing else.

Even at the hospital all I had to do the day before was Pee in Cup and Get Bloodwork Done.

finally a win for cheye... insanely grateful for this to have gone so well and so easily in my city. and grateful to keep evading things necessary for my health LMAO

I HAD QUESTIONS LIKE YOU DID THOUGH! so even though my experience probably isnt helpful, you can find the experiences of many other ppls scheduling, consults, insurance calls, and exams in this subreddit! They have lots of informational flairs/categories and ppl even make posts on things you can ask the doctor to bill the surgery as so that insurance has a better chance of covering all of it! I was OVERprepared for my consult from the info I got from here!!! I read every single experience throughout this entire time for mental prep!!!

[thehopelessexception]

how can a person know everything at 18 but nothing at 22 (almost 24)

warning: im writing this while im on my period and eating ice cream.

i've been dissociating for what now? half a year maybe more. i dont recognize reality. i feel im floating in this sea we call society and i've been feeling the wilson of the story here. i assume everything that's happening around me is real, ofc. but that doesnt make it any less a convenient arrangement i build for myself to try to act like a real person and not freak out. i am feeling out of reality. like the part of the game where you let the sim on auto-mode. i am the sim on auto-mode. and i don't know how to stop this stage of oblivion.

to make a vague introduction, the thing with me is that im a living paradox of a full time contradiction. i am flamboyant but i hate being perceived. i like to speak up for myself but i hate people thinking about me because of it. i have my own process of how i understand things. i trust logic and i question everything. im quite skeptical over things when there's no empirical evidence. i seek for knowledge. critical thinking, data analysis and the whole stuff. i know myself. i sometimes look like i am too obnoxious, frivolous, morally corrupted (people have told me that), when i obsess over something —because i sometimes treat people like they are stupid (not my intention really)—; but probably the only thing im completely sure of is myself. i tend to be a confident person, to have an ego, to not let the guard down, to calculate every single move. and lately i am noticing myself being impulsive, insecure, nervous, weird, saying stupid shit, nonsenses, feeling small. and i don't know how to make it stop. the thing is i put my whole self-esteem backed up by my intelligence, however im not sure of anything anymore. i don't know if the reason behind not recognising myself lately is the fact i have somehow a new crush —or a new hyperfixation for that matter— or just the natural act of growing, also known as the quarter life crisis.

i have this thing where i hyperfix on random stuff, i've been like this my whole life. one of my friends even made a powerpoint of all the things i've been obsessed with over the years. and the issue here is that this things never last that much, or maybe they do? i actually never though about it. the most random ones i remember are probably me buying ice-cream cakes of this specific brand every week for two months. i also got obsessed with eating too many scrambled eggs all day every day for a very long time. then it was that turkish telenovela on an airing channel. then ofc succession, and it grew into watching every single movie kieran culkin was part of. the world cup. mbti —im intj by the way—. red white and royal blue (i watched it five times in a day), then nicholas galitzine —did yk he has a lineage that comes all the way from the romanovs?— and his entire filmography. and also politics, i got way into politics; election campaigns, follow up candidates, history, economy, the law, etc (my candidate lost tho) (we're succumbing to disgrace) (like literally we collectively, as a country, haven't had any kind of good news since then) (please help me). and etc etc. but the thing is, i also hyperfix on random people, or not so random i guess. it doesnt happen very often tho, im quite picky, but the procedure is this: i meet someone, they draw somehow my attention, i want to know everything about this person, i talk to this person a lot (medium to long term) (week to months), and then this person becomes my friend or i get bored and completely ignore them for the rest of my life and move on.

but this time is different, or im feeling it different. i find myself questioning everything i know and i was convinced of. i dont know if it has something to do with the fact that i met someone, probably the first person wise enough to make me question if i was ever correct about anything. maybe i am hyperfixating on this person, idealizing them. but it's truly amazing how much more data this person has about everything i know of. and right now i feel way too insecure, because even if this person told me they find me smart and they enjoy talking to me, i am always thinking that if i say something not completely fact-checked they'll think im stupid. it's absurd. it's a boohoo situation, i know. and it's a process im having about who am i, or what am i supposed to be. some months ago the whole context around my life changed or i think it changed? i dont know how to explain it, —i mean i know how but i would have to talk about other things not related to this (politics stuff, things happening in my country, etc). i'll probably will make a new post about it someday—. but the whole issue is, i dont know myself anymore. and everything is crumbling.

im afraid the person i build for myself it's a fraud. or doesnt exist anymore.

i remember myself at 18, and i was this marvellous whole person. independent, smart, focused, driven. that girl spent their whole days outside her house. did everything she wanted to. wasnt scared of anything. and i look at myself now and think how? the pandemic has a lot to do with it i guess, but when i first heard taylor saying that in nothing new i thought "that wont happen to me". guess what, i was wrong.

for my fellow girlies being 23 —in my experience— is exactly how they say it will be. the worst age of your life.

next month is my birthday and im pushing 24. and i have to say my life is a mess. but i dont know if i can call it a mess because it is truly a mess or because i am a complete drama queen. because people probably have worse problems than mine, and i am what you call a white girl, only poorer —and a third world country citizen—. the issue is, i am almost 24, almost 25. almost 27. ALMOST 30. and i did nothing with my life. absolutely nothing. my mom had me at 29 for god's sake.

and by nothing i mean everything i do is not enough to feel it worthy of a life well-lived. should i look for a job and work while studying just to say i am extremely occupied because i have somehow a life? just to feel something? even if that makes my stress situation and anxiety even worse? should i somehow save enough money so i can move from my parents house? even if for my whole generation it's close to impossible? is studying something i (kinda) like enough to not feel like shit about myself? i've never had a boyfriend, nor girlfriend. shoud i look for one? get myself one? even if i dont think any of that would make me happy? i dont think i know happiness as a state of mind, nor the concept of it.

i dont feel like i have many anecdotes to tell in my future. should i measure the life-worth by anecdotes? my friends feel the same way i do, but they have a more organized life. jobs, boyfriends, careers, plans for the future, one of my closest friends move to the other side of the world with her boyfriend (!) in the blink of an eye. but they aren't much happy nor they have many anecdotes either. and i dont have the money or the guts or the available friends to create any.

every day i understand fleabag a bit more.

my favourite anecdotes about my life are from when i was about 13 and 15 years, also known as the worst time of my life. i didnt appreciated it back then, probably none of us did. but when we were teens everything was possible and we didnt have a care on anything other than mundane stuff or rebellious stuff but nothing more than yelling at people, drinking and smoking weird shit (i never had weed tho). not a real responsibility. being careless, free, avoiding consequences that mattered. i think that girl hates me right now. and i am not sure if that's the feeling i should have or if it's just utterly pathetic.

[salon-maiden-anabel]

the more i think about your mom lucy hc, the more i really adore it. if you don't mind me asking questions about it, what's her general dynamic with kieran & carmine? is she a single mom? how does dahlia fit into the picture?

SORRY THIS TOOK SO LONG TO REPLY TO MY BRAINS BEEN. TRYING . the thoughts are disconnected but by god there are thoughts everything below the readmore

But! Hi hello welcome to Oh lord this family needs therapy and counselling . ! Honestly I have been going into everything with the idea of her being a single mom w/ them! It;s very much a situation of like.... Parent that works away from home constantly, so the relationship is just unfortunately naturally more strained kinda thing .

With all this i go with like.... The idea that they were very much born in Hoenn and lived there with Lucy until Carmine was approximately 9 or so, and Kieran was 7 [I do like to imagine they're 16 and 14 respectively as of the dlcs]. Work being so remote and stuff plus worrying about their education and all just led to living with their grandparents in Kitakami being the best decision for their development as yknow, People. I like to imagine Lucy visits periodically throughout the year and such to check in :> just takes a bit of coordinating. Also shes absolutely the reason they're able to go to blueberry for highschool via both making sure they Can go there financially and putting a word in to a battle focused school of them being kids of a facility head :p even if realistically Lucy isnt the strongest head by any means lol . it's kinda like if an E4 member put a good word in situation. And we can see with Lacey and Drayton both going there... gestures. I wouldnt be surprised if more children of different league figures go to it or schools LIKE it. But thats besides the point Lucy absolutely like, struggles with her emotions and such. Even from the small bits of dialogue we have from her? Maybe its just my autistic ass reading too much into it LMAO but . gestures .

i feel like if this werent a kids game she'd just tell you to fuck off to your face here

sorry just more quick looking too much into dialogue but. cmon. CMON. ...She's . definitely influenced how carmine and kieran act at least somewhat .

Carmine might be the easiest to point a finger to as being like her mom but i genuinely think that it;s actually Kieran who ended up the most Like her, yknow it;s incredibly obvious to point a finger at Kieran during indigo disk and how he talks as being her fault a little bit :p anyways thats just me vaguely mumbling abt that. AS FOR. DYNAMICS. Kieran isnt as close to his mom as Carmine is just due to everything with living with their grandparents. Theres also absolutely like.... Very much a gap because he stopped seeing her as much when he was younger, while Carmine was only a year off of being like. Legally start being a pokemon trainer age. And its just Awkward, relation wise, just because of how little she actually sees them through the years, especially when the discussion would slowly shift to more "How are your studies?" "How are you doing in school?" "How is your pokemon training going?" once they start going to blueberry. Which i don't think was ment to come off as uncaring for them and only focusing on training as it did from Lucy's end, but I dont really think she knew what else to ask and all, because she stopped being able to really pick up on their interests as much as they got older. Plus thats just kinda How she talks... With the importance on strength and luck n all that. Then with all this I imagine she like. Probably only called once maybe twice between the dlc plots n all? And once again with just mainly the training questions it was just a sour spot. I wouldn't doubt Kieran would also struggle with not wanting to be in a shadow/the nepo baby accusations /j that I fully think if Drayton knows about he'd tease him and Carmine about. So like. All that with the instilled importance of ones strength :sob: Lucy you were not helping the Kieran situation. Hell I don't really think she would of even known about anything going down between Kitakami to Blueberry with Kieran just because neither of them wanted to tell her at all? Because again just that Awkward connection between them, just the permanent fog on all communication that feels like someone said something wrong at all times and it got too awkward to finish. IDK I think im waffling on I don't know how to formulate my thoughts the best LMFAO BUT I THINK... DYNAMICS WOULD CHANGE POST-MOCHI MAYHEM ESP. Bc i KNOW she'd find out after carmine and kieran nearly fucking DIE in the underdepths and everything hits her in the back of her head at once that she needs to repair what she can w/ them because she almost lost them. Probably means taking an extended leave from working at the Pike so she doesn't have to worry about scheduling to see them in person for only a short period of time. Especially if the times line up for them having any extended break from school . It's never going to be perfect, far from it, with their dynamics and all but. gestures. Briar needs to sleep with one eye open for a bit at least. in short

AS FOR. DAHLIA im in turbo hell because I can not see? the siblings ending up like they did if she was also around? Shes such a force of positivity as a person im just. blinks a bit. Im in hell bc i adore the ship as my big rarepair ill die on a hill for but nobody expected the kitakami siblings especially not me so . i think if they ever do get together it'd be somewhere nearer to scarvio era which just. yeah. see image below

[scatterbrainedbot]

RAT SONS LORE DUMP #1

THE HAMATO FAMILY

okay so im looking at my first few character sheets and theres a little bit of lore/context i want to give just to clarify, specifically about the last generation (of humans) in the Hamato lineage

(long text heavy post ahead!)

so background:

in the 03 version of tmnt The Ancient One (who is not a Hamato) essentially adopts three children: Hamato Yoshi, Yukio Mashimi, Tang Shen (girls dont get surnames i guess??) They seemed to have been explicitly raised as siblings. Still, love triangle trope was hungry ig. Both boys fell in love w Tang Shen and she fell for Yoshi. to which Mashimi said ‘alright bet’ and killed her. i cant even laugh at him for his pathetic Nice Guy “i was nice to you for years and u wont have sex with me???” tantrum cos like. sir, that is ur sister. boy howdy. all of yall need to go meet some other people.

mostly i chalk that whole mess up to the fact that the writing of women in most media in the early 2000s lacking like idk?? any actual characterization?? an ounce of consideration??? not a single braincell?? they were mostly just there to be a means to some plot trope, rather than an actual character in and of themselves — like im amazed april came out as lovely as she did, with her own like life and skills and autonomy (her big sis vibes in 03 are so so nice, and tbh i love her whole character a lot — still lots of misogyny moments in her writing too but im not trying to do an analysis into that rn)

so anywho!!

for the rat sons au, i decided to go ahead and scrap all the incesty undertones (idk, are those undertones? seems p straight up to me?) and completely revamp the origins of The Ancient One, Tang Shen and Yoshi <3 (and Mashimi too ig, but he essentially got cut out entirely. sucks to suck ya entitled lil douche)

Here's the general lowdown

So, the Hamato clan is one of the oldest and well established in all of Japan. The family rose to prominence in the feudal period of Japan’s history, due to their collective skill in the art of ninjutsu, their dedication, stealth, and discretion. Like most ninja, they were assassins available to hire, either for killing or simple sabotage, for politics or personal matters – though no matter the task, a Hamato’s loyalty was always to the head of the Family over their client.

Beyond their reputation as a ninja clan though, the Hamatos also had a reputation for being extremely generous to their community and highly protective of the less fortunate. (think kinda Al Capone vibes, like oh these bitches hella dangerous. but also. will def tip over $100 soooo…) This did lead to occasional conflict of interests during assignments/contracts. Most Hamatos would then seek the advice of the head of the family, and follow their lead, be it to the benefit of their client, or not.

(This also led to several members either abandoning the clan, or being killed by their clients for failed action etc etc)

As time passes and we reach the mid twentieth century or so, there is only one final heir to the Hamato lineage. A young man, named Hamato Sho. Sho spent his youth trying to serve his family and honor their name etc etc etc. But ultimately, this got him caught up in a lot of corrupt powerful nonsense that he eventually walked away from after the death of his friend.

This friend had left behind a young daughter, Tang Shen. Since he knew she had no other family to claim her, Sho took her in, expecting to only be a temporary foster at most. Surprise! this quiet five year old kiddo melted old mans cynical heart to absolute mush. his daughter now bitch.

He only ever adopted the one child, and he adored her sm. and he tried his best to be a good papa. he nurtured her curiosity and engaged in her interests and taught her everything he knew, without ultimatums or concerns about family names. at times he could have probably been considered very lax in his parenting, or far too lenient or undisciplined, but as a kid that grew up suffocated by watching eyes and guiding hands and Destiny capital D, i think that by giving his child room to be her own person and do her own shit (especially in her teenage years) he was in fact showing her a level trust and pride than he never had been given himself. basically he did everything he could to give her the exact opposite childhood he himself had (like rise splints <3)

Because of Sho’s encouragement, Tang Shen grows up to be a very independent soul, whos never met a problem she can jerry-rig, bodily move, or roundhouse kick into being fixed. She also becomes a fucking badass ninja master (and mystic warrior, lol) though mostly all she wants in life is the maintain the quiet little farm her father has started. maybe kiss the cute boy from town who walks her home sometimes (even though he lives the other direction.)

Meanwhile, Yoshi (surname pending) is in fact not a Hamato. Yet, at least. he, however, is that cute boy from town who walks home with Tang Shen most days and has been absolutely smitten with her since like fourth grade lol

(theyre besties for like a decade before they officially start to date. They get together finally after Tang Shens been trying to figure out a good date idea (one that isnt just something they already do) to ask him on for like a month, and Yoshi just leans over and kisses her goodbye super casual one day cos he thought they already had been dating for like. six months. cue her delight and his abject horror (he never wouldve kissed her if he didnt think that was already established as okay. p sure he even like asked her before randomly like, hey is it alright if i kiss u goodbye? and she was like ????? ok??? is this cos of ur european studies class. theyre both very silly) shes gonna tease him so bad about all of this. and tell Sho. Yoshi will never know peace again /affectionate)

Mashimi doesnt make any real appearance in their story i dont think. Like he might be a friend of Yoshi’s in elementary school. probably had a tiny start of a crush on Tang Shen when they were small and tried to take the ‘pull pigtails on the playground’ route of getting her attention. what he got was a kick to the chest and a broken nose. never came near her again after that. (eventually started avoiding Yoshi too since he was with Tang Shen all the time)

All that being said though, im afraid Tang Shen is not fully free of curse of the unwanted suitor. The Hamato name still carries a fair amount of pull, after all, and there are some very dangerous people looking to make some claim to its influence.....

[haikyuu-and-more-haikyuu]

Valentine HC

So there is like one hour of valentine's day here were I live, so let's do some HC just because...(i actually think valentine is a stupid thing, mostly because it's just not so big here; but stores tries to push it). I have been single for my 25 years of life, but I often give gift's to my bff's. Like small stuff; like a little chocolate and some homemade shit they can hang on their wall or something. Just to make them feel a little more loved. Hope you all had a great day and that your week will continue in that manner <3

Sugawara x Sawamura: Depend on year to year. Since Daichi is a cop, he will sometimes have a shift in the late evening or night, so they can't be doing much. If Daichi is stuck at work; he will call a flower shop and make them deliver a bouquet to their home so Sugawara would be met with a gift when he comes home. Sugawara can't send flowers to the station, but he packs a hefty lunchbox and does the extra stuff as to make heart shaped rice balls and send a note with. He will also have dinner ready or at least a plate that Daichi can reheat if he comes back really late. If they have the evening off, they just order in food and dessert and just enjoy themselves. If they feel like it, they go out and take dinner at a barbeque restaurant and maybe go to a bathhouse.

Yamaguchi x Tsukishima Also depends if either of them have work or not. The museum closes earlier than the office Yamaguchi works at (if it's not holiday period with more tourists). But they usually just go out to eat and maybe catch a movie if they see anything that interest them. If they can't make the time cut, Tsukishima will drive over to Yamaguchi's work, if he is stuck at the office, and he would of course already have picked up some burger and fires ( so they will become soft when they arrive home). Yamaguchi, if he knows Tsukishima will be stuck working longer hours, he will also pick him up and have bought a store-bought cake they can share. They have been friends since childhood, they don't want or expect the other to give anything bigger than some food that they can share.

Kageyama x Hinata Both are athletes and busy. Sometimes they have late practice, sometimes they are out traveling with their sparte team, sometimes they are together, but still busy. I think neither of them would do too much. Maybe Hinata will buy a box of the jelly energy drinks Kageyama likes to have. Kageyama would probably do a similar favour back and buy him a pack of energy bars he could just stuff in his bag and have something to-go when he needs it. I do think they would both have tried at one point ot do something more romantic; but it wasn't for them and they have time for regular date night throughout the year - so they 'dont 'stress it too much. If they have time though, they make a heartly meal together and give each other massages.

Kuroo x Kenma Both of them are busy. Kenma has a yearly stream for his viewers on valentines. It doesn't take too long, but it's something to prepare too. Kuroo is busy with work as usual, but they both make sure to have the evening for just the two of them. They take a drive to disconnect for a few hours and just pics a place to eat dinner on the road. Sometimes it's ramen, sometimes its a hot-pot place, sometimes it's McDonnel's. Sometimes they drive to a desser cafe and then to start talking until they closes and are forced to leave whatever place they decide. They have a rule to not buy a gifts, but if either see the other lacking something; they just sneak it in on that day as an extra specialty.

Tanaka x Kiyoko Tanaka was very nervous the first real valentine they had as a couple. He and Noya had tired to brainstorm some ideas he could do to treat Kiyoko, but they all seemed to extravagant or to little. Kiyoko, the first year, just shoved up with some chocolate. As in Japan's, on valentine day; girls give chocolate to the guys. And a month late, the guys give chocolate back on white day (14th of March). So Tanaka of course gave chocolate back when it was time. They still stuck with the tradition, but also have a date night at a restaurant and just take a walk through the city centre. Tanaka tried to act though, but it doesn't take much for Kyoko to make him stumble over his words. Kiyoko also tries to act cool, but one romantic gesture from Tanaka have her blushing all over the place.

Iwaizumi x Oikawa They didn't get together until a few years after high school. Plus Oikawa plays for Argentina and Iwaizumi coaches the Japan's Men's volleyball team. So there's a hurdle. If they can make time and the time zones doesn't mess them up too much, they skype call for hours. If they, by miracle: is near each other, they have this weird way of rivalry since they support different teams and will often tease and goad on each other. They know it's just for fun. But when evening comes; they can always be seen walking the same path home. Oikawa one year sent Iwaizumi some money with the message to just buy himself a gift. And this started a tradition. They send over a small amount of money with the massage to just buy themselves a steam bun or a bar of cholate or some extra stuff they want with the massages to take care.

Ushijima x Tendou Ushijima is a very practical person and Tendou is literally a chocolatier in Paris. So they face some of the same problems Iwaizumi and Oikawa have. Tendou makes batch of his finest chocolate that Ushijima likes and sends it over with express delivery so it will arrive around valentines day. I feel like Ushijima is the kind of guy that likes those confectionary chocolates with nuts in them. Ushijima doesn't really understand the in's and out's of this day. He did receive more than enough confession and chocolate in school; but he never really cared about that. At the start, he didn't feel like he could give a chocolate-maker some cholate as a gift. Maybe it would have been too much. Doing something else out of the norm, made him feel like he didn't care enough. Now that he knows the people Tendou works with; he makes a deal that they go out and buy some flowers for him and a gift card on an eastern Asian themed restaurant that they go together when he is visiting paris. Tendou always appreciates it, especially since he misses Japan from time to time.

[timetravelstudies]

whats a good starting point for a guy who wants to get into led zeppelin!!

HEHEHEHEEHEHE… hello anon, come in come in….. sit on this nice cozy chair dont mind the leather straps on the armrests heheeh……..

ok in all seriousness. And ill try to keep this as short as i can. theeee lz experience is hearing them play live, rather than the studio recordings. This may sound weird to hear from a guy born 20 years after lz stopped doing shows lol but theres a LOT of material out there that u can watch/listen to if u wanna get (what i assume is a fraction of) the experience. Probably the easiest thing to find and in best quality (though in my exp the quality of online streams is still atrocious, maybe theres some hq torrents though?) is “the song remains the same”, a concert film of three dates they played at MSG in 1973. but theres also videos floating around of their concerts at Royal Albert Hall 1970 and Earls court 1975 (you can check yt for these) plus a few odds and ends here and there (im a big fan of this tv appearance in france 1969, though this was super early on so their performance “style” isnt yet well defined, esp wrt plant, but the actual playing is still peak imo)

as far of audio-only live recordings go, theres of course the album version of TSRTS, the BBC sessions album (of various radio appearances they did through the years), and the album called “how the west was won” with live versions of many of their more popular songs taken from a couple dates in california in i believe 1972. These are all on spotify or yt or wherever else u listento music. Theyre also really well mastered (and remastered, and re remastered…) bc Jimmy Page is anal like that. So even if theyre live theyre great quality and u can hear every instrument distinctly.

ALSO theres like a million lz bootlegs out there, which is like its own niche subfandom(?). A bootleg is an illegal recording that fans made back in the 70s and then spread around and/or sold for money. the digital versions of many of these are available on yt and archive.org but theres also a huge marked of selling them, the og 70s vinyls are especially prized. idk much about lz bootlegs bc i never could listen to a single one all the way through as all the noise bothers my brain lol so if anyone reading this does and has tips please share<3

I spoke about live stuff bc in my opinion, and also according to members of lz, fans, various music critic type people, basically everyone agrees lol lz studio songs were just kind of the first iteration of what would then mutate and stretch into a more loose, longer, live experience. Imo lz, studio or live, is some of the best music ever made point blank period, but its definitely not for everyone, in that you have to be able to get in that classic rock/prog rock* type of mood of songs lasting anywhere from 6 minutes studio to 35 minutes live, and taking you on this weird journey with ebbs and flows, rather than having a tight structure that is easier to follow and listen to like all pop music ever. i mean this in an entirely value neutral way: a pop song, whether from 1965 or 2015, is easy to listen to bc IT carries YOU through the listening experience, whether you want to or not, whereas for instance a 20 min version of dazed and confused live requires you to willingly be there. Its not work or effort, exactly (at least not to me) but it definitely requires a different type of attention.

and btw maybe you knew all this already lol but i said it incase you or anyone else who ends up reading this doesn’t know a lot about rock

ANYWAY, of course theres also the actual studio albums. i dont think theres any specific way you should listen To them, like my friend has been going thru them chronologically but back in the day when i was just getting into lz i just jumped from one song or album to another as the mood struck me (which is how hoth ended up being the first lz album i ever heard… i think itd finished torrenting first and i liked the cover and took it on my ipod on holiday with me, and now its my favorite album of all time & engraved on my very soul lol). If you want MY recs of the stuff i like best, i have this recruitment playlist where i put a mix of my fave lz songs and the ones i think are must-listen for any new fan.

Ok so i ended up writing a bunch anyway LMAO. ty for the ask lmk if u have any specific questions ❤️

[lorillee]

ok time for lorillee to talk about yakuza 5. Instead of studying for her finals. Forewarning this got a lot longer than i was anticipating

first and foremost. even with my beef with what they did w majima ive gotta be so honest i think this is prob my 2nd favorite yakuza game.

^insane statement from girl who literally will not shut up about that man but i had suuuuuuuch an insanely fun time with the majority of this game like its honestly crazy.

that being said we're going to go ahead and get the elephant in the room out of the way first.

its actually like bonkers crazy insane how little they elaborated on majima and parks relationship especially given the fact that we got the bomb dropped on us that majima was literally MARRIED for some period of time?????????????????????

^like theres a lot i could say on this and actually you know what theres a lot i AM going to say on this. because the entire thing is just actively ridiculous

the really interesting thing about majimas role in this game is hes on screen for approximately like 8 minutes total probably. well maybe 10 if we're being generous. but hes like integral to pulling 75% of the plot together because of all the nonsense hes been pulling in the background/his relationships with a bunch of the major players. hes kind of like everybodys dead wife simultaneously

and like his lack of screentime isnt really hurting much of the suspension of disbelief wrt kiryu and saejima because for the former we've only had 4 other games of them interacting and Well saejima is literally majimas sworn brother like neither of these are relationships we really need to be sold on in the first place, and additionally for saejima we get those like 6-7 minutes at the beginning of his story to set the scene for their relationship in this game. so its fine we're chilling.

but with park & katsuya & majima its like. Well frankly they give us jack all to work with. our entire understanding of any of the dynamics going on here is like a handful of lines giving only a bit of information what was going on between park and majima at the very end of their relationship from park herself, and then a brief recap of the trio's general relationship third hand from that random guy. the lack of effort going into developing anything here is almost laughable

like park and katsuyas relationship even though its not terribly elaborated on 1) still gets something from katsuya himself and 2) is easier to digest because these characters are being introduced at the same time. like theyre both new so saying omg they were totally besties is like Ok sure got it.

but we have known majima for approximately four games now and neither of these people have been brought up in any capacity and youre telling me theyve been involved in his life for a minimum of twenty years???????? Give me a break. like obviously majima is insanely cagey so its not really much of a surprise that we the audience dont know this but because of the complete lack of elaboration it feels insanely shoehorned and frankly borderline unbelievable

we dont get like a single on-screen word from majima on either of them. we have literally no idea how he and park even met in the first place, god forbid started dating. the relationship is barely even justified within the text.

^and again we circle back to one of my biggest gripes with this series ever: COMPLETELY UNNECESSARY ROMANTIC RELATIONSHIPS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! im gonna be so insanely honest with you there was literally no reason to make majima park's husband and given the astounding lack of effort on the text's part to justify anything going on here i really dont feel bad saying this. like her husband literally coudlve been any random shmuck off the street and her relationship with majima could have been the same as katsuya's.

like because its not like the letter was even real. it was literally a decoy so theres actually no reason for them to have been estranged for like 20 years they literally couldve had a normal platonic relationship and absolutely nothing wouldve changed. But because this is yakuza the writers will actually shoot themselves before not having one of their main characters be in a romantic relationship of some sort we dont get those sorts of luxuries

additionally lowkey besides the fact that theyre allergic to letting majima be on screen for more than 15 minutes per game i honestly feel like if they had actually spent any more time dealing with all the insane implications of this relationship and what we know about it they wouldnt have been able to justify it being majima so they just chose to force him into the role they needed him be in for the story to work the way they wanted it to and then decided not to elaborate legitimately any further. Because his ass would not be doing any of this.But whatever

Unrelated but given that park is kind of a no nonsense woman i literally do not know how she stood his ass to begin with because hes literally one of the most annoying people on planet earth. But this is neither here nor there

anyways in the end because this entire thing just pisses me off im glad we got legitimately absolutely nothing in terms of meat to this relationship so i can join everybody else apparently in mostly kind of just pretending it doesnt exist. But as something of a storytelling enthusiast the laziness is truly appalling.

EDIT: ok actually sorry its been a handful of days and i saw a reddit screenshot that pissed me off so bad im actually 10000% willing to acknowledge this relationship because Like sorry but get real majima is not the victim in this relationship he had literally not a single bit of business marrying a barely legal teenage idol. if i ever see a reddit man talk about park i think im going to attack him theough the screen

whatever lets talk about something i actually enjoyed instead. namely; THE REST OF THE GAME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

ok i was hating on her at the beginning of the game but highkey i actually quite like park i think shes a really fun and interesting character - like ok her relationship with haruka is soooooooooo so interesting because. lets be so honest she kind of sucks. she's actively manipulative and has a strong tendency to steamroll over everybody else to get what she wants and has honestly kind of very little concern of how everybody else feels if she thinks shes doing the right thing.

she blatantly projects her own dreams onto haruka and like no ok because its actually reaaaaaally intereesting because at the end when haruka gives her little speech its revealed that she hoped to make it big as an idol specifically to support morning glory. Like she straight up does not even give the implication that she became an idol for the love of it she became an idol to relieve the financial burden of the orphanage.

which is kind of insane because at the beginning park's justification for driving kiryu out of running morning glory was that he was preventing everybody else from being able to follow their dreams because theyre all too concerned about the money situation and are willing to sacrifice what they want to do in the future to keep what they have.

like park's whole reason for recruiting haruka and kicking kiryu out of her life was so that haruka could follow her dream...... But its not even haruka's dream because haruka's underlying goal in all of this was literally just to keep morning glory from closing its doors. its literally just park's dream and she literally knows it because when she's trying to motivate haruka at the beginning of the haruka story she literally threatens to shut down the orphanage if haruka doesnt sweep this whole competition.

and like this isnt to say that park does not care about haruka - its pretty well established i think that she does and seriously sees haruka as the daughter she could never have. But also because she was actively abused as a child and whatever was going on with her relationship with majima (which frankly from the little we heard and if nothing else implication of the ages they met at. Does not sound good at all) she actively does not know how to have a normal functioning relationship.

so even though she loves haruka as her daughter she's also actively manipulative and projects literally all of her baggage and dreams and problems into her. and because haruka is desperate for any sort of connection after having been isolated from her family and her father and community and has really wanted an older sister/mother figure she views park as a mom in turn. which is based as hell i love found family that sucks

anyways so tldr park is an insanely fun character and if anybody other than me says anything bad about her ill kill them I LOVE MENTALLY ILL WOMEN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

sorry we're literally not even talking in order anymore whatever its fine. anwyays i actually super adore harukas entire story in this game and it makes me sick that theres people out there that dont. But theyre also like reddit men so its really not even worth commentating on

anwyays it actually kind of makes me want to start attacking people how haruka and kiryu's stories parallel each other in the sense that like. i dont really know how to explain it but in short it goes that obviously kiryu's profession of choice would be Well being in the yakuza. as we have established multiple times previously and continue to re-establish over the course of the game. hes dragged back into it time and time again to the point where its almost actively contrary to common sense that he keeps leaving after whatever event he came back for concludes. But even though he'll always be yakuza at heart he still chooses to turn away from the tojo because theres something else more important to him and its haruka and the rest of the kids at morning glory.

and similarly, regardless of the fact that her underlying motivation was the financial support of the orphanage, its pretty clear that haruka really enjoys her work and life as an idol and very likely would have continued down that path as a career, but in the end gives it up because it would require her to permanently cut off kiryu and he'll always be more important to her than anything this career would have to offer. anyways it literally makes me sick i love u guys so much

ok lets actually take a step back for a second here to talk about the more overarching stuff

overall id say this is definitely following the trend of increasing writing quality in these games just like in terms of pulling together a largely coherent storyline. i talked a lot more about this in my y4 review so i wont bother repeating the details of it here but in short by introducing multiple concurrent storylines theyre able to cut down on a bunch of the bloat, but again obviously there are pretty notable downsides to this like having to tie everybodys plot together in a way that makes sense and having more threads than you have time to elaborate on or wrap up. so we kind of winsome and lose some but overall i think we're winning a lot more

im gonna be honest im kind of baffled tanimura did not show up like even at all. crazy because we literally gave him the final boss battle last game and youre telling me we're bringing back everybody else from y4 in terms of main characters except for him? Not super complaining bc i wasnt terribly attached but its still a bit weird i think

in terms of his replacement . honestly i feel like shinada was the weakest link in the narrative cohesiveness because his entire shtick lowkey feels incredibly removed from everybody else's. like his story is really important narratively in terms of like the discussion on dreams But functionally he's kind of holed up in his own little world

^additionally on this point i think the lack of connection to majima is not helping here because like i said at the beginning of this post his nonsense is the glue holding 75% of this plot together in terms of kiryu/saejima/haruka&akiyama's plotlines and getting them to all come back to kamurocho, but its just kind of weird that shinada has absolutely 0 connection at all to him or anybody else other than daigo

like to be clear i didnt dislike his story but it just feels so insanely removed and frankly kind of self contained in comparison to everybody else's melodrama that im not really sure what to do with it. like his final antagonist was some guy he had never even met before this incident and had absolutely 0 personal connection to in any meaningful way. so it just feels kind of strange.

like everybody else has their own distinct little mini adventure but it all ties together in a way that makes sense partially just because they already know each other and are connected by the common thread of tojo clan melodrama and majima nonsense. but whatever

honestly i dont have all that much to say on kiryus plot im just so insanely happy that random lady did not show up again because i seriously did not have it in me to deal with ANOTHER nonsense kiryu romance. overall liked it, enjoyed, kind of a small note but i really liked the visual progression of the final boss battle in terms of fighting aizawa out of the heart of the tojo -> to the main floor -> to the outside. very epic

also its kind of funny that when you put the money into the atm to send to morning glory it really is just flushing cash down the drain. i sent them a bunch of money because i felt bad but there was a part of me that was wondering if youd be able to pick it back up as haruka or something and literally no like that cash is gone

saejimas story i also really liked honestly im always perpetually distracted by how much cuter he is with the buzzcut im so glad he keeps it. i also really highkey love his perspective on the concept of avenging majima because its like well really not what youd expect from somebody in the yakuza and its just a really interesting character trait.

im gonna be thinking about absolutely snatched baba for the rest of my life

saejimas fight with majima on the rooftop highkey kind of makes me sick and its also crazy that majima said all that stuff re: their conversation in the batting center because like girl get real We all know you are lying. Badly. MAJIMA I LOVE YOU FOREVERRRRRRRRRRRR

it also actually makes me sick that majima was the one who kicked saejima out of the tojo like hes actually terrified of losing anybody else to the point where he actively tries to drive them away from him you have PROBLEMSSSSS

also unrelated but its insanely funny that he faked his whole death and somehow managed to get away with it and we got absolutely not a SINGLE detail on how any of this happened. me personally im still rooting for fake open casket funeral. WE LITERALLY HAD A WITNESS WHO PERSONALLY SAW HIM DIE? And like come on you cant pull the bulletproof vest because that man does not wear a shirt.

adding onto that point though more seriously majimas role in this story is just kind of weird because even though hes the glue responsible for holding half of it together the vast majority of what he's been running around doing is entirely background and 95% unexplained. which again blessing and a curse and also lowkey kind of bad writing

anyways i also really liked that daigo got to be more relevant this game but hes still kind of a perpetual running disaster. lowkey he kind of needs to get fired because hes always fighting a war with his own stupid clan but also i would feel bad because like i said earlier hes trying so hard. and also theres not really another other options at hand since the tojo hierarchy turnover is so egregiously high and like Well nobodys making majima patriarch.

^but considering my vague knowledge of 3jimas existence hes getting out of here at least temporarily for a bit? So we'll see..... we'll see....!!!!

actually devastating to me that we did not get to see hana this game.... talked to her on the phone for like 3 minutes but it was objectively one of the best parts of the game. hana and akiyama you will ALWAYS be famous to me.

akiyama and haruka are also an insanely cute duo theyre so special... LITERALLY LOVEEEEEE

akiyama honestly is sooooo good i literally love him so much forever. He still highkey needs to get his ears pierced

theres honestly not too much to say on his plot since its more haurkas than it is his but this is just a win for feminism. that beign said ti was kind of weird at the end where everybody was like omg akiyama we love u so much forever Because i feel like he didnt really do all that much. but ok

also completely unrelated but i feel like theyre becoming less trigger happy in terms of killing off 75% of the supporting cast. which is just kind of weird to witness and also just strange because they certainly pulled that move in y0 which comes out after this game. so who knows.

OH ALSO i cant believe i literally forgot to talk about it but the major plot twist this game actually were like. GOOD? like the whole reveal with the omi chairman i was like "HELLO????? Im actually stupid for not seeing this coming." that being said i think aizawa being his son shouldve gotten some foreshadowing too so that one was kind of a classic yakuza cheap twist but whatever. lowkey i was just shocked i didnt see the thing with the omi chairman coming sooner

i think thats rpobabblyy it. i might have more thoughts but overall REALLY FUN GAME. i had such a crazy good time as long as it was not in the period of time in which i was going through the 5 stages of grief over the majima is parks ex husband reveal LOL

[thepowerisyouth]

MONEY / FINANCE STRESS CONTENT WARNING, this next line is unfortunately quite stressful about money so this was an important warning for me to add:

This is also less for the random strangers on the internet who have no reason to trust my advice but more for the 10-15 people I know personally who trust my money advice based on prior experience and Ive sent them my blog link in the last month or two

US stock market is about to tank. On a global perspective its stupidly overpriced because markets like China are hitting 5 year lows (as in we've increased our stock market over 2x since "COVID lows", but their market is even lower than it was then.

Timing is hard but it is entirely possible yesterday was the peak of the market. Might also not tank for 6 months.

Market psychology is fucking weird tho so please absolutely dont 'short' anything, which is basically the same as 'buying puts'. Michael Burry nearly bankrupted all his friends, family, and random investors by insisting on 'shorting' things based on knowledge of impending crisis.

Just sell everything. I mean literally everything. Bond etfs might go up but youd have to have eyes glued to the charts to sell in time. Gold wont do, neither will bitcoin. Their negative correlation to stocks isnt really a thing anymore.

Get every etf, stock, whatever into cash in the brokerage account, then move it out of the banks/brokerage firms and into something physically in front of you because we are, in fact, in another 'historical period of bank runs' its just not quite at the peak yet.

Not trying to increase anxiety beyond nessecary-- its just that any, single bank can immediately freeze your money-- leaving it up to the Federal Government to pay you back-- and it might possibly be the case that youd have to rely on whats called a "bank bail in" to see your savings again.

Not a fun situation to be in, even if it wont happen to most people its just safe practice to do this during a "historical period of bank runs"

----------------

This blog is basically my diary of my thoughts (suprise suprise). But Im an open book, privileged (but poor) little white boy with complex societal/generational abuse and very little home problems so lets fucking go theres a whole mormon cargo van to unpack

Definitely recommend tags Im terrible at them.

---

To those reading this, if you have ever met me in real-life or on the internet than you have taught me varying degrees of information which can be randomly retrieved by my brain at any time depending on current CPU performance. Thoughts of my loving husband have occupied my headspace probably 95% of my time since 14 so he has absolutely taught me at least 100x more than anyone else in the world.

When I say "I", oftentimes Im thinking about "me and my husband", or even sometimes "me and my friends/family", or even sometimes "me and society"--- but I am not always 100% aware of the current headspace environment and/or beliefs of the minds of those around me without feedback

---

There are currently over 8 billion individual varieties of the global human language spoken within the mind. Lets start translating them all. Misunderstood words become mean labels.

I fucking hate mean labels

"Math wiz" = racism and/or classism and/or gender shit. Fuck that shit

When a person is niched off into one part of an 8 billion population human society, it becomes impossible to not "live in a bubble". Bubbles change in size constantly even if not visibly observed. Bubbles can be different sizes depending on your current day-to-day thoughts of your own society. Bubbles must pop. Enlightenment implies life only gets better the more times ya pop and lock it

My path away from purely mathematics, logic, and scientific theory began when I met my husband, and for the first time in my life it became important to me not to be an asshole to everyone around me

Ive been told (only after I started dating my traumatized husband tho and helped him heal a lot) that I'm a natural communicator-- and all my life I found myself listening and learning to everything and everyone around me trying to understand both their and my own motivations-- then I like to garble them up and spit 'em out. My memory recall ability is wonky tho and fluctuates highly with nutrient intake-- I'll get into that later

I wish I could have a million years to read every blog on tumblr. I really do. Connecting & communating is extremely important for understanding one another but it takes time

I had an extremely unique childhood (who hasnt lol), enough so to isolate myself quite a lot through sheer dumb luck. My mom is also everyone's favorite school teacher so of course I was learning a lot from a young age. Luckily I glued myself to the first person who wanted to glue themselves to me equally & we grew exponentially closer to eternity

If its still not clear: my husband and I are bored and love chatting with people, but like most internet loving freaks my mouth don't work sometimes well but my fingies do. My ears got fluff a lot but I got eyes for LEDs like a hawk. Wish they werent LED tho

I also have a naturally short sleep cycle (i.e. extra time for this), and I really wont be offended or weirded out by someone reading through and liking 20+ or whatever of my posts at once randomly. Stories are supposed to be read in chunks, and I think of this blog as a story & also workspace for my thoughts that Id love to see which chapters everyone has read through. Also I love (and only respond positively to) positive feedback, yet also suggestions for ways to improve my "theorums". As in, good faith discussions are totally welcome on any post.

For my 50 year old parents reading my blog so lovingly in their limited evening time-- you can sort by tags to see what topics your familiar with, if you play around with the search function while on my page. Mom. Show dad how to do it

In the very, very bottom of my blog I dont even think I managed to tag shit properly-- but its the roughdraft workings of the philosophy, as well as my own logical framework for answering lifes questions. Its 2 months ago so I might not even be writing according to my own works down there anymore idk I change fast sometimes

Last thing for now here is that I was always criticized by teachers for not showing my work, and for not reviewing my tests before turning in, and I pushed back hard because nearly every time I went over and corrected a mistake-- I saw I most often got it right the first fucking time on a pure hunch. I act on impulse when I'm not meditating mostly for efficiency purposes because I believe I'm correct, but remain open to emotionally positive feedback so I can help remove all doubt.

-------

This might turn into my 'life story' post, as its already going there. Heres what I have so far in the way of my knowledge of my family before I was brought into existence, and my "earliest memories":

Family context:

I dont know jack shit. Nobody talks about it at all.

Here's my own observations Ive made using the framework and perceptive filters I was given--

My whole family is white Texans.

Ancestory is slaveowners of course, further back is a very likely direct parent-child descendent line from the most famous inbred british royalty of the 13th century i.e. King John, whose brother was the arab genociding Richard.

I would call my immediate family as upper poverty class. Its more like poverty with extra privileges cause mental health stigma was the only thing holding them back not other shit too.

As children we had a lot of very privileged opportunities because my parents made a lot of sacrifices to try and bring us back up the class ladder. Lets look into that generational trauma issue

My dads parents (born in the early 40s, dont know the year exactly. I think '43 or '44) were more upper middle class, pretty high income. Owned an insurance business that was very successful by the early 2000s at least. My grandpa is described to me as a "monster" and "violently abusive". I have a single memory of him screaming at me as a young child and I was cowering under a desk, so I really believe it. No other stories at all to provide context.

-- I gotta split this section off I realized I wrote the next thing about post-me context Ill need to move this part lower down later--

My grandpa got early onset dementia, my dad didnt notice in time, and my grandpa bankrupted his successful company and lost several million of dollars to "scammers and sexy ladies."

My dad found out around 2015-16 or so. He told me a little bit after telling me my grandparents were getting divorced. My dad managed to scrape together about $200,000 which is being sued for by the IRS actively.

(He split that money in two, and entrusted me tell him how to invest half in safe value stocks that I handpicked as well as a calculated risk allocation to bonds which we sold for 30% profit the second the market crashed. He gave the other half to a brokerage advisor. I never met the advisor but saw the results. Dont get me started on how the other dude did with that money-- we started this endeavor in January 2020.)

Personally I also dont believe that its possible to spend an entire fortune on scammers and strippers, so Id love to see his books and figure out what the hell went wrong with that asshole. I have a hunch I know something more than anyone else ("Enron", guys, we're talking about an insurance company in HOUSTON, in the 2000s) but I will never be sure without the books.

----

Back to other family--

I do not know a single thing about my grandma on my dads side. She raised me quite a lot, but yeah I literally have only heard her life described to me as "she was a housewife"

On my moms side, my Mimi (also born 1940s but slightly younger so I think 1946 or 1947) came from a divorced, upper middle class family. In 1964-65, She and her step mom both got knocked up the same year so she watched her divorced dad remarry to said step mom when she was 18-19 and getting a shotgun marriage herself, so you can imagine what that was like. The "biological" of the two moms was a very good mom and very queer from what I hear. She died when I was a baby, from lung cancer. Thats all I know. My mimi raised me quite a lot, nearly equally as much as my mom did

My mom's dad, my Papa, came from a rural farming family in East Texas. Dont know much else of anything, but he and his siblings were named "Billy, Bobby, and Betty". As in, they are what everyone likes to call "hicks"

--

Moving onto my direct parents now. I know a little more about them of course, but since we're getting closer in age to the present-- I think itll be easier to describe my understanding as common stereotypes. If its unclear what I mean definitely feel free to ask, but I'll probably say "I dont really know"

Not much else is relevant other than knowing that my moms family was the mormon one, but that as soon as my dad was love-bombed by the church he joined to. Mormons were also different in the 90s I'm told.

My dad struggled with being one of the "crazy schizos" of the 90s. As in, very traumatized, upset, and gaslit by the government and his parents. Must have done a damn good job dealing with it by the time he was in his late 20s and I popped out cause he was never a "bad dad" to me at all. Definitely yelled and was more angry at times, but less than any other friends parents Ive ever met, and from what I remember he came into my room at night and apologized to me literally every single time within like 5-10 minutes. I know pretty much nothing about him pre-me. He was a tradesman my whole life and specialized in remodeling kitchens & bathrooms (the 'dirty work of construction'). All his initial clientele were the rich people my grandma lived near and was friends with.

My mom would have been extremely queer-presenting and posting on tumblr if born in the year 2000, but was born in early 70s, and was a raegan teen in high-school in Texas during the satanic panic-- she presents completely cis, straight, but has body dysmorphia issues. Thats about you need to know about those issues I'm sure my tumblr folks can assume the rest and be perfectly correct. Cause thats about all I know too and I'm assuming the rest about my own mother

--- Earliest memories

I think a lot of people face doubt about their own earliest memories, maybe hearing the way I connect the images of these events in my head to my emotions I felt will help others do the same.

----

Two disclosers about me & my current healthcare discoveries before moving on

1) My only "major" childhood trauma is loneliness. I have a partner now (started dating early high school, nearing 10 years together now) who was just as lonely and we are glued to each others side constantly, and have made our life work great that way. So don't feel too bad reading this, I'm only able to write it down because Ive healed that trauma and can dig this stuff up with no issues to validate the emotions I felt even as a child

1) I believe I have a genetic trait that is only just getting discovered. There are something like 6 discovered mutations that hold this similar trait so far, and its just basically chronic insomia.

It being a genetic trait tracks with how my mom describes me as never settling into a normal sleep pattern at 6 months old, having absurd amounts of nightmares and death anxiety keeping me up at night as a child, and I still dont sleep at any given time. I average 2 hours less sleep than my husband, who averages 7-8 now that he isnt actively being abused at home.

Going to get sequenced but even if negative I'd probably just be a 7th mutation, as they only found the other 6 genes via case study.

The scientists whove discovered it call it "Familial Natural Short Sleeper", if you desire to look it up. They describe the trait like its the best possible thing in the world. Well... terminally chronic insomia is not the best thing in THIS world thats for sure.

---------

My "earliest memories"

These arent ranked by time accurately of course. Took enough effort digging through my brain to turn them up, not like Ive got a 2003 calendar stuffed in here as well.

I did do my best to sort by first memory but it also might be sorted by the order at which I recovered the memories as being one of my "earliest" when I was a child and asked such things

1. Pure emptiness. I can only describe it as dissociation. I can remember nothing about the environment around me, except feeling suddenly sucked out of it, seeing only darkness, feeling almost a ringing in my ears and the deepest dread possible. This same feeling followed me in life for a little while, but started to take more visual shape when I was an adolescent, until at some point I would see myself sitting in a chair alone in a room that is infinitely sized but that slowly gets darker the further out you go. I cant remember what exact "real-world" event caused this feeling to ever happen each time it did. I just can remember having it happen occasionally when I was awake and doing things. Definitely dissociation. (If you are willing to believe me further I think its just probably "lights out" and being scared of that)

1. Riding a mattress down the stairs. I kind of remember two images, one is the tunnel vision of going high speed down the stairs and the other would be from looking back up at the stairs when I was done going down. Totally fun, probably my first rollar coaster ride. I might remember my siblings laughing too but it wouldnt be because I can remember the actual laughing-- but I can remember feeling the joy of being in a group of people laughing. At the time, my parents were selling the house so thats why I also remember it being a completely empty carpeted room that we were riding down into

2. My brother smashing his head repeatedly into the refrigerator for 'fun' and someone saying "wow he has a hard head" or something along those lines. I was learning english I cant remember exactly what they said but that was definitely the meaning I took from their words. I think this memory is strong, because I was truly very curious as to why my brother was just running at full speed, head down, and headbutting a hard surface. The words someone said after that must have been one of my first 'answers'

3. Watching my siblings play in rare Houston snow. Not much remembering there actually. Probably just thought it was mezmorizing to watch as I just really remember a picture and feeling peace

4. Will add more later.

[musubiki]

What were the Lime and Mochi/Coco and Taffy “oh….. OH” moments for the both of them?

OH GOD!!!!!!!!!! mochi and limes are harder to pin down.....i will try to speculate how i see it right now:

mochi @ lime: happened when they were younger, middle school maybe? up until that point her and lime would occasionally talk and were forced to walk home together, but were nowhere NEAR best friends. at some point mochi started getting bullied since she was so weird and quiet, lime stood up for her and got into a physical fight with the other kid. anyway afterwards, after they both got sent home my the principal, mochi was like "maybe he isnt so bad?" and the crush developed and RAPIDLY grew since after this they actually became friends for real

lime @ mochi: THIS ONE IS HARDER TO PIN DOWN!!!! theres no single moment, its a BUNCH of "yeah shes cute but i dont like her." "yeah shes nice and cool but i dont like her." "yeah i mean if she wanted to kiss we could i guess but i dont like her." over years and years slowly descending into madness,,,,.....the thing that started tipping him over the edge is RIGHT before the witch thing started, theres a night where she was staying with his family (in the webtoon, its right where we left off), and fell asleep with him where thats the first time he stayed and cuddled with her for the night. it started as "yeah yeah comfort mochi while shes crying and sad" but they both fell asleep, and when lime wakes up in the middle of the night to mochi snuggling into him he CAVES!!!!!! his whole mindset, within the span of like 10 minutes, starts shifting to "maybe mochi as a girlfriend isnt a bad idea.............................". in the morning he tries to rationalize himself out of it with "no way, im just touch starved. no way, i just need a girlfriend and would feel like this for any girl. no way, if i was gonna like her at all i wouldve liked her by now" and from then on its a constant battle of "god DAMN i want her bad" and "FUCK no shes my best friend, the fuck?!"

taffy @ coco: this moment happens relatively fast. basically, theres a period of a day or two while she is currently kidnapped by taffy who is trying to lure mochi out, but he has no intentions of hurting her or anything else beyond holding her there until mochi arrives. at some point he hurts himself (humerously) like fucking cuts his arm by accident on something and its PROFUSELY bleeding and he sees nothing wrong with that, probably says something like "Its just blood." coco, who is absolutely about to vomit, rips a sleeve off her jacket and wraps his arm with it and taffy is instantaneously confused, shocked, and emotionally attached. this man does not experience kindness regularly. any time after this when he runs into her at random times he is NERVOUS. (he hold onto that ripped sleeve for like. forever. after he joins the guild coco is like "why do you still have that?!! did you at least get the blood out?????" and hes just silently protectively sentimental about it)

coco @ taffy: for coco, there is ALSO not a single moment, its a slow and growing process of learning who he is and what he is and how she can help him. its probably one of those things where you spend so much time with someone you care about so much emotionally, and then one day (during the timeskip when theyre living together, he just comes back from his day job and walks in the door and coco realizes shes in love with him (this is long after she already knows he loves her like crazy)

[melissa-titanium]

the ask game stuff..001 for N nd doll (giggles

GO FUCK YOURSELF . but thank uou... anime berdly emoji . ill answer...FOR NOW

001 | send me a ship and I will tell you:

when I started shipping it if I did: VERY RECENTLY ACTUALLY id say within the last like two weeks. ive always loved doll and always loved n but then i realized like. oh huh i connect alot with n and want to make out with doll . boom. its like borderline selfship at this point its cringe as fuck but let me do whatever i want.

my thoughts: surprisingly i don't have as many thoughts on them as i did but i feel like. because of how much of a foil doll is to uzi i think thats the word it would be like. IDK i feel like for doll it'd help to understand the 'humanity' of the dds. if she witnesses a disassembly drone killing war machine trip over his own tail or bump his head into a doorframe and wince and laugh and talk and hug with gentle arms and do things that she specifically reprogrammed herself NOT to do so she'd have a better chance to kill her worst enemy and avenge her parents... she would short circuit. to actually get to the point of not killing him on sight would take a while or lots of coercing via ... lizzy? or hell maybe even uzi im not sure. unless they had an individual encounter (which, you know, could totally happen! doll out in the wastes and n is on a solo hunt, you know her ass was following them.) that lead to a stalemate, i'm not sure how they'd even meet. HM OK NOW IM THINKING ABOUT THIS. either way tho n has a habit of befriending insane drones (or like... smoochin depending on how you see enzi tho i see them as platonic) and i think he could. Not fix her but he could be there for her bless. and again i think she could help him be not a doormat 💛 also stupid hc i had aboit them i hv always thought doll to have like... a freakishly good memory. which, works perfectly paired with n because like .you know. his memory prahblems . dolls ass can remember the angle of your arm when you were like fucking sitting on a chair on the 13th of april last year or some shit like she PAYS ATTENTION even if she doesn't often share her input... which is also a good thing bcos n is super inclusive always. n voice DOLLLL LOOK WE ARE DOING A THING!!!! :D & shes just like. sighs okay (comes ova 2 him) and eventually.. i think itd get to the point where she can go do shit on her own without being explicitly invited YAY

What makes me happy about them: gotta bring up the Me & My Wife shit again bcos its borderline selfship at this point. i just think its interesting and awesome I REALLY HOPE THEY HAVE AN INTERACTION... tho i doubt it; i think they might fight or smt in ep 7 WHICH HONESTLY I WOULDNT BE SAD ABOUT my goil needs moe screenrtime

What makes me sad about them: doll probably hasnt experienced like. affection in fucking ages & frankly n really hasnt either. i think they'd hold hands and talk about their kill counts. also i just realized they both kind of went thru a period of time tht was little socialization only KILL. doll had school & lizzy, sure, but also living in an apartment with ur parents' & dozens of others' corpses its like. tht fucks w u. but the interesting thing about them is… n and doll don't experience guilt over Killing And Eating People the same way i think. like. just for example v and uzi do (atleast in my perception). like v couldnt cope with the knowledge she had so she fell extra EXTRA hard into her role (atleast using her maid self as an accurate portrayal of her old self) and uzi has never ever experiuenced anything like that before so its fucking terrifying to her. however, with doll and n… they dont percieve it the same way. we understand that both of them are capable of guilt but it takes a very strong connection for them to experience it. ep one; n feels bad for making uzi argue with khan & ruining the card game. does he say a single thing about killing and eating half a dozen workers? No! because it's natural to him. there's nothing out of the ordinary in that situation except for the fact that he was "rude" by interrupting someone & "rude" by causing an argument. yes, he's very sweet and patient and all of the above but he doesn't see killing as really a BAD THING… he sees it as a necessity; as him being useful, higher numbers means hes doing a good job. but, really, that's all he's known. he doesn't remember being a worker. after meeting uzi he's capable of realizing… oh, these are living creatures! i feel a little bad now. but the guilt doesn't come crashing down onto him and leave him utterly devastated at his kill count, it just sits there. it festers. similarly, in my opinion, to how doll reacts to guilt. we see her as this unstoppable force at every point until the end of promening. she knows her goals, she knows what she has to do to get to them, and has shaped herself into the perfect killing machine to do what she needs, removing all forms of guilt from her person to make sure it doesn't get in the way. though, again, it comes bubbling to the surface back from where she buried it so deeply under all her anger when uzi pops her emo little head in. she isnt instantly all "oh my god, what have i done?" but it eats away at her all of this fucking time, she has been killing and hurting her kind, believing she was the only one who could possibly shoulder this burden and deal justice to those who deserved it. but now that she knows she isn't alone… it festers.

things done in fanfic that annoys me: i've seen like three n/doll fics literally EVER but i'd honestly say. major mischaracterization of doll... i feel like doll gets mischaracterized more than n? n's behaviours are easy to understand and read with a surface level understanding because he has more screentime and again ON THE SURFACE looks relatively simple. i think a huge thing in some fanfics that bugs me is that. imitation of speech patterns = perfect characterization WHICH IS NOT TRUE... but also understandably makes it difficult to do with doll because she doesn't talk alot, while N talks a LOT so it leads to a heavy imbalance in mischaracterization. just because the characters would fucking say that, doesnt mean they would Fucking Do That

apparently there is a word limit on tumblr. pleasantly surprised this will be two posts instead

[lightleckrereins]

Seemingly getting rid of the silver alt variations and giving Meg one costume with no variations also seems to be a choice. I wonder if by next cast change they’ll have the US cover system with no alt costumes.

I think Meg not having pants is another on the long list of things six is trying out with this cast. One of the things long running shows need to do is being smart with where they spend money, not making very expensive costumes that will only be used a handful of times is one of the most common practices. And that is not a bad thing.

Many shows refit costumes for new cast members, or share big pieces like skirts and coats. With six its not easy to refit costumes or share anything aside from crowns or ruffs in a single cast. But they are exploring alternatives. Alt boots with interchangeable straps mean alts will have the fancy designs without making three separate pairs of boots. Alts now have one or two wigs made to be easily restyled into multiple queens vs having four separate hairpieces. Its been a process of trial and error thats still not finished.

For this cast change it seems they were aiming for having two strong covers for each role (which is what most shows have anyway) plus a third cover just in case with the swings. Ignoring the fact that six always needs extra coverage and that Natalie would be out during a complicated period it is a good cover system. Everyone said no second covers or alt costumes was not a great idea (and we were right) but objectively it is a solid plan.

Meg not having pants I think falls into this. Silver only uses pants for parr and she is probably third cover: Hannah first, Natalie second, and if they need both Howard and Parr with Hannah out I think Meg would get ptiority for Howard. Second priority swing costumes are very rarely worn so they are a big investment that will probably hang in a closet most of the year. Meg not having pants makes sense. But I also don't think it was the right call. (Also I dont think her having boleyn over pants would be the best plan either)

Focusing on priority cover variations for the swings is a good idea as those are the costumes they are most likely to wear. But they are still swings, they should go on for all queens; its like second covers, with most alts they rarely go on for those roles but there has never been a cast where they arent needed. So yes do variations for priority but also make sure they have variations that work for all six queens. Parr with open skirt doesn't necessarily work. But you know what does? Cleves with pants and Symour with pants and its not ideal but Parr with shorts. Do you see where I am going? I stand by the best swing variation set is open skirt, cleves and pants. But if the production is cutting variations make black open skirt and cleves and silver open skirt and pants. Its the middle point, less variations to make but it still covers all six queens.

And Meg not having pants now doesn't mean she won't get them in the future, six WE is at a trial stage for alts. I wouldnt be surprised if she gets a variation sometime soon.

Also I don't think UK casts will switch to Us cover system, both work very well for their respective continents.

[misanthropicdoe]

idc if i am dramatic. my blog was there for me every single day for six years. i dont have a real life, i dont have any friends, nobody knows me or even who i am or my name. for the first time ever in my life i felt belonging. idc if i am crazy, but i've had nothing and no one for so long, my blog became my best friend. it was there though several heartbreaks. it was there for me during the first worst period of my life, when everything crashed and i broke. it was there when i went through all my rough phases, it was there to catch me and hold me. it was there to listen to me completely judgement free. it was there when i stopped having contact with my father. it was there when my friends left. it was there through all of my health chrises. when i received no help from the health care system, when i was dismissed and ignored and mistreated. when my sisters stopped talking to me. after every traumatic and scary and uncomfortable moment. no matter what it was there to listen to me. i was never alone because i had my blog. my blog i could pour everything into. idc if it is unhealthy because it was all i had. idc if that is chronically online because i dont wanna live in the real world, it is too dangerous and here im safe. idc if none of it is real bc i dont care for reality. and not only the blog itself, but honestly there was the place people were nice to me. irl i have been bullied and discarded and hurt and abused, but people were nice to me?????? that was the first place i've ever experienced that.

idc if im autistic, no other blog feels the same. it just doesnt feel the same. every day for six years that blog was my anchor. it grounded me. it was the sole reason i wasnt so alone i ended it all. when i was sad, i told it. when i felt the urge to show someone all my stupid fucking pics of snails or the sky or whatever, it was always there for me. always. no matter what. i think ppl would think i sound insane but something inside of me is broken, i cannot have real relationships and connections with people. im so far away from everyone. even my mother. and she gave birth to me. im just not fully human, it hurts and i wish i was but im not. i dont talk to ppl, i dont connect, bc im just filling a role so they wont hurt me. my entire existence is just to fawn so others wont hurt me as bad as they could.

i want my blog back bc it is all i had. and the first time i got my blog termed i knew that oh yes i was blogging abt tcc so like i get it. sucks but i get it. this time it was safe for six years, and then just bc i felt upset that some stranger was saying smth hurtful and judged me on one of my vent posts, i got so mad so i told them off. and then half a day later my account got termed for "promoting sh" and idk if it is all my posts abt it i've made or if it was that one fucking picture on that sideblog where i responded to that person, that pic i reblogged from someone else with faint marks. i've seen more and worse on other ppl's blogs. blogs that are still up. why did mine get termed but not everyone elses??? (i dont want that bc im insane and fucked up but i think ppl should post that if they want) but im just so heartbroken bc it is unfair. why is all i had gone?? i once reported a blog w cp and it stayed up for months. mine got termed in less than a day. everything i had gone just bc of one "sh" post. one report.

i cant stop crying. and i just dont care abt anything else. that blog was the first and only time i've felt "home". idc if i sound insane. i am just not like others and i never will be. i was broken and ruined and i just am this way. i cant connect. i dont have anything else. and now its taken from me. i dont feel whole. i feel like the most precious and treasured and beloved piece was stolen from me. theres probably smth very wrong w me for feeling this way for just an account on social media, but, i think it was the only thing i've ever felt truly safe to let myself feel a connection to. and the fact that no matter what happened to me, no matter what other ppl did to me, i would always have my blog to run to... and that i no longer have that is hurting me so much. i think i most likely had some neurodivergent attachment to it bc i just do not feel the same way abt my other social medias. they could delete my instas and pinterests and twitters and i'd be like oh damn that sucks whatever. and i am here crying and typing but i feel removed from this blog. and all my others. it was that blog i felt attached to. and it is gone. just bc i was so fucking stupid and just had to tell someone off. i never will again, i'll let anyone walk on me i'll let anyone violate all my boundaries and i'll never speak up again just pls pls pls pls let me have my account back.

[thrifthi]

Josh Hutcherson Count Report!!!

[Long post ahead]

If you follow me, you'll know that since the peak of the Josh Hutcherson Renaissance, I started the Josh Hutcherson Count, inspired by the comments under various IG reels stating the number of Joshes they have encountered so far to illustrate the ridiculous popularity of the meme. Under the cut will be a review of the data collected by me over a period of over a month - from 23 Nov to 31 Dec of the number of Josh posts and reels I have encountered on Instagram.

So, to start things off, I would like to say that this is nowhere close to like a proper study or investigation. At first this was just like a fun thing I thought I was gonna do for like a week when the meme dies off. For the first week, I basically used sheer memory to count the number of Joshes that appear on my Instagram feed, which definitely means the data collected is not going to be reliable, but whatever. After one week, I got a tally counter app, which increased the reliability of the data collected. However, this count should still be taken with a grain of salt because I think I counted on other social media apps once or twice, even though the scope was only on Instagram, and I stopped collating data at the end of the day after 1 week (I knew the number of Joshes in total, just not the number of Joshes per day). (Also I think you should take this with a grain of salt because this is literally a Josh Hutcherson count, not a serious academic study or anything haha) (and I liked those josh reels so the algorithm gave me more, which skews the data up)

Fortunately, I'm that one annoying friend who sends every single reel I see, so I also sent many of the Josh Hutcherson reels I encountered to my friends along with the number of Joshes at that point in time. One of my friends (@gghggabc) collected all of the Joshes that I sent to complete the data (absolute mad lad btw) and created a graph illustrating the trend in Josh appearances.

Without further ado, I present to you, the TOTAL NUMBER OF JOSH HUTCHERSONS I ENCOUNTERED IN 1+ MONTHS:

1562!!

yes. that's a lot but that is what i got.

GRAPHS!!

(ok low key 3 dec looks wrong idk what i was doing that day. but yeah that happened i guess)

Credits to @gghggabc for helping me do the graphs and collecting the data.

So, as you can see, the Josh Hutcherson Renaissance reached its peak in late November - early December (or according to my data at least) and then slowed down significantly in December. The cumulative graph became less and less steep until 31 December, when it came back up a little bit (I vividly remember seeing A BUNCH of Josh Hutcherson edits popping up on my feed as I was watching the New Year countdown. it was wild). There were a lot of fluctuations in the number of Joshes encountered per day, most likely due to different screen times and whether I interact with the Josh posts or not.

Average number of Josh per day: 40?

Min number of Josh encountered: 7

Max number of Josh encountered: 214 (thats insane i dont know if this is correct anymore thats way too much)

What are the conclusions?

Josh Hutcherson >>>

Memes are a very powerful thing

I should probably set things up more properly the next time I do one of these, maybe get ppl to join in too for a bigger sample size

I should continue to send my friends every single reel I see

Thank you for reading until the end!